Monday, November 12, 2012

Seashore Boar – Tom Macon style!

Do you like pork? Have you ever had boar? It is very different. Recently, I had the chance to go poaching with a redneck friend of mine. We aren't sure if its legal or not, but we went down to the shoreline with our black powder muskets and got us a 240 lb. wild boar. That was crazy and so much fun. So if you are interested in some good eatin’, figure out how to get you a wild boar and then rustle up some pork rub seasoning, fresh lemon rind, green peppercorns, onions, potatoes, and a case of beer.

Gut and skin the boar. Be sure to dress it out like pappy showed you. Rub the skin with 3 cans of the beer and then sprinkle on the pork rub seasoning, fresh lemon rind, green peppercorns. Clean and quarter the onions and potatoes and placed inside the cavity of the boar. Completely wrap the meat in clean canvass cloth so the vapors are locked in as well as possible and the drippings will not escape. Drink the rest of the case of beer.

Slow smoke the primal cuts, turning or rotating as needed to insure even cooking. The time will vary greatly depending on the size and cut of meat you select. My friend and I did the ham. We found that if you are doing a whole boar, its best if you smoke it all day. However, quarters will usually cook in 5 - 6 hours. When we did ours, we dug an Indian-style chimney pit and placed the meat on a grate and covered it with 4 feet of dirt back-fill. When we returned the next day, the meat was perfectly tender and beautiful.

Just about any hardwood will do. Oak and hickory are some of the most popular and most commonly available. Mesquite and fruit-woods can add a sweetness to the meat, but don’t overdo it. Avoid evergreen trees because the high resin levels will give your meat an unpleasant taste like a bottle of PineSol toilet bowel cleaner!

My buddy says that if you are wanting to serve the meat in slices, you should cook it till you notice that the meat is about ready to fall of the bone and has become very tender. At that point you would unwrap the meat and brown and baste to firm up the meat.

If you're wanting the meat extremely tender and juicy then just cook it overnight like we did.

If you don’t want to dig a smoke pit, there are many different options on how to properly smoke meat. The basic issues to control when smoking meat are maintaining a low cooking temperature and maximizing moisture retention in the meat. Some people use the Reynolds Oven Cooking Bags instead of wrapping in canvass.

If you are trying to do low-temp cooking in lieu of smoking, we suggest a cooking temperature around 225°F. The goal is to slowly raise the internal temperature of the meat to 180°F and then hold it there for about 2 hours. “Slow and low” is the key to tenderness. I would guess that cooking time will be about 1.5 – 2 hours per pound of meat, but can vary based on thickness and whether or not it’s bone-in or bone-out.

Many recipes will tell you to pull the meat when it reaches an internal temperature of 190°F or even 200°F. That advice works because it takes about an hour for a modest size piece of meat to increase from 180°F to 190°F. I would not recommend going much higher than that for very long because you begin to lose moisture in the form of steam.

Lower cooking temperatures of 180°F - 200°F can be used to great success, but the cooking time will be much longer. Cooking at temperatures above 250°F is not recommended because the meat cooks too quickly causing increased moisture loss and does not allow ample time for the collagen to break down (it makes for dry, tough meat).

Don’t forget to baste periodically coating the meat with liquid to add moisture and flavor as it cooks. Just about any liquid will do as long as it is low in sugar. Sugar burns quickly so only add glazes and BBQ sauces during the last thirty or so minutes of cooking and only long enough from them to firm up.

My buddy Chad and I hope this gives you some ideas for Wild Boar!

- Tom Macon

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Tom Macon has a HERO!!!

So everyone has a hero. For some, it ends up being a super hero from the pages of a comic book. For others, it is a role model in their life. For Tom Macon, it is the dudes of Epic Meal.

When I saw their Bacon Tree, I cried like a little baby being beat for crapping their pants in a Pentecostal Sunday Worship Service. I mean, over 2,000 strips of greasy bacon cooked crisp and served in the spirit of Christmas... what else could you want? (Other than some elves to clean up afterwards!)

I share this with you as an inspiration. Sure, you could aspire to do be rich or have a hot looking sports car, but for me it's all about the bacon baby. In my book, these guys have their priorities straight. That means a lot to me.


Sunday, February 5, 2012

Where did Tom Macon come from?

So for all of you that have been wondering where a bacon-lover like Tom Macon comes from; I thought it easier to just show you than describe it with flowery words of prose.... enjoy!

Thanks for your inspirational assistance.

P.S. I will not be showing you what happens at the end of the happy journey of a Bacon Cheeseburger... that's just sick John Anthony from Denver, Colorado.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Like Bacon? Try Tom's New Dating Site For Porkers!

If you are an admirer of healthy women, then join me at my new dating site just for admirers of BBW. The site address is:

You won't find any skinny Minnies here. Everyone of these beauties is packing some extra junk in their trunk. And I don't have to tell you bacon fans what that means. Yep, slap the bacon and ride the wave in boys!

Now for some romantic music to play while you're lighting the candles and dimming the lights:

And if you are more in the mood for getting piggy wit it, then try this one on:

No matter what your mood is, break out the frying pan and throw in a couple of pounds of bacon and get ready to get happy!

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Bacon Porn Makes Me Hot!!!

Yep, you done heard me, "BACON PORN"!!! I found this on YouTube and just had to share it.

This girl has talent and a mouth made for takin' da bacon baby!

Now here she is in action:

So if you want to see her eat meat, try this "Western Iowa Bacon Casserole" recipe from the "Bakin Bacon with Macon" cooking show:

Should Tom get a tat of Sponge Bob? Or should he go off on her like Obama's translator?

So this is a hard decision for me. I have gone all of my live without hitting the ink. I have been dreaming about getting a tattoo on by frontal investment. (No, not there!) I must be going through a midlife crisis or something? Anyway, I made some suggestions to my wife, and she hates them all. I thought maybe a tat of Kermit spanking Ms. Piggy would be cool? Or maybe even a slab of bacon in a frying pan with my domain name underneath? Nothing I came up with seemed to be a good idea. So my wife always has an opinion when it comes to art. Back in 9th grade she won the best of show for use of pastels on art board, and simultaneously won the spelling bee the same year! She is a true artist and competent speller. Somehow as fate would have it, she gave up a career in art for a quick marriage. The twins weren't mine, but I wanted to do the right thing by marring her. If you ever saw the movie, "Me, Myself & Irene", it was loosely based on her relationship with a vertically challenged truck driver that stopped frequently at the Lucky Lou Truck Stop where she worked at the time. One thing led to another and she got dumped off after he discovered she was 3 months pregnant. The difference in real life is that she eventually came back to me, and our kids are better at basketball than scholastics.You'll have to watch the movie to fully understand.

Any who, I fell asleep in the easy chair this morning after a big bacon breakfast, and awoke to my wife on her knees fondling my belly. For a moment, I felt like a teenager again in the back of my Dad's Buick Electra 225... then I realized that she was down there finishing up a homemade tattoo idea she had. I was able to stop her before she drew Patrick in a compromising position. In a conversation with an R&D team leader at the Sharpie Corporation, the maker of the markers; I found out that the markers wear off in about 2 weeks. My wife wants me to get your opinion on what you think I should get as a permanent tattoo. If it helps in your decision making process, my wife has a tattoo of a penicillin syringe on her backside and the individual signatures from every player of her favorite football team. I don't really care for football that much, so probably something pork related is best?

Take care and be sure to let me know what you think.

- Tom Macon

P.S. When I say go off crazy like Obama's translator, here's what I mean:

Testimonial from a bacon fan named Danny

The following is a video testimonial from a "TomMaconLovesBacon blog" fan! I share it with you because some of you be speadin' da hate related to my passion for bacon. And to all you haters, I just wanted to show you that some of the real-men out there get it! And Danny is the man for stepping up to the plate and giving video witness of his support for bacon and my site. Don't be shy. If you have a bacon fetish, speak up. Come out of the proverbial closet and lay a slab of thick-sliced sweet hickory smoked pork belly in the public cast iron skillet and fry it up brother! Be proud of your affinity for bacon!

Bacon admirer Danny shares with us his favorite Bacon eating Bitch video:

P.S. Danny, thanks for the tip on where to buy lard-based facial cream for my wife. I know if she will use it diligently that the mustache would soften and fade. Great hookup brother, much thanks. - Tom Macon